On Advice

I’ve been thinking about advice lately. It’s kind of funny how much time we spend asking other people for advice. We will literally adjust our life course based on the advice of others (that seems kind of wild haha). We treasure advice so much that we devote entire shows to it! It is kind of a funny concept. I was thinking about some of the best advice I had gotten and I thought I would share it here.

“If he likes you, you’ll know. If he doesn’t you’ll be confused.”

“Don’t worry so much about finding the answers and finding love and finding success. Just do your work. Live your life. Be kind. Be good. Pay your own electric bill. It’s going to turn out okay.”

“Build a good name. Keep your name clean. Don’t make compromises, don’t worry about making a bunch of money or being successful — be concerned with doing good work and make the right choices and protect your work. And if you build a good name, eventually, that name will be its own currency.” — Patti Smith

“On my last day of Criminal Law class, the professor gave us this advice: be an expert. He said our generation is often too focused on keeping career options open, and too scared close any doors, so we remain generalists. I’ve seen how my peers who became experts in specific areas have risen to the top of their fields. Others who are broadly accomplished generalists have been hard pressed to stand out in job interviews. I give this advice to younger people all the time — even if you have many interests, it’s advantageous to pick one to pursue professionally (keep the rest as hobbies!) so you don’t become a mile wide but an inch deep.” — Lucy, entertainment lawyer

Don’t be frightened: you can always change your mind. I know: I’ve had four careers and three husbands. You are not going to be you, fixed and immutable you, forever.”
― Nora Ephron

“Life is short, the world is wide, make memories.”

“Someday, sometime, you will be sitting somewhere. A berm overlooking a pond in Vermont. The lip of the Grand Canyon at sunset. A seat on the subway. And something bad will have happened: You will have lost someone you loved, or failed at something at which you badly wanted to succeed. And sitting there, you will fall into the center of yourself. You will look for some core to sustain you. And if you have been perfect all your life and have managed to meet all the expectations of your family, your friends, your community, your society, chances are excellent that there will be a black hole where that core ought to be. I don’t want anyone I know to take that terrible chance. And the only way to avoid it is to listen to that small voice inside you that tells you to make mischief, to have fun, to be contrarian, to go another way. George Eliot wrote, ‘It is never too late to be what you might have been.’ It is never too early, either.”
—Anna Quindlen

“Sometimes the best way to get friends to hang is to call them up and suggest doing something RIGHT NOW rather than try to schedule anything. It works, and I kind of love it.” — Sadie

“Something I once read really shifted my feelings about appearance. The writer asked us to think about the people in our lives that we deeply love. What do they look like? Are they models? Thin? Perfect? I began to think of some of my dear friends in their 80’s, wrinkled and grey. My brother, who is insanely tall, hairy, with a funny underbite. I realized I don’t love them because of their looks. I love them because of who they are, their beautiful hearts, their generosity and loyalty. My thinking shifted about my own looks and I realized the people who love me most feel that way. The fact that the sun-spot on my cheek is getting bigger or that my neck is getting saggy in my forties has nothing to do with it. I have to love myself for the same reasons.” — Twlya on Seeing My Body With Fresh Eyes

“‘What if I told you that you could make $5,000 by having a five-minute conversation? Then would you do it? Because that’s what it is.’ This is the question my husband asks (also to himself) when someone has to negotiate their salary.” — Rachel on How to Ask for a Raise

“Resist the urge at the beginning of the party to put out enough chairs for the first few guests. There will be one person who doesn’t fit on the couch, and that’s okay! It helps to keep the energy up and the conversation flowing.” — Mia on Very Easy Dinner Party

“When things get hard you don’t panic. You double down, remember who you are and call your mom to give you a pep talk”

And Finally-

“Oh, how I wish I could have a time machine to tell myself…
1. Wear sunscreen, wear sunscreen, wear sunscreen.
2. Appreciate the body you have. You’ll look back at pictures and wonder why you were so critical of yourself.
3. Apply for jobs that seem out of reach. Successful people don’t take jobs where they already know how to do everything that is required.
4. When dating, ask yourself if they are right for you instead of trying to be right for them.
5. Enjoy all that pre-parenthood time to read, take walks and talk to friends for hours.
6. Spend time with your grandmother. You’re going to miss her more than you can imagine.” — Jill on Advice to My Younger Self

What is the best advice you’ve ever gotten?

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